On March 20 I recommitted myself to my 2017 goals. I started waking up at 4:45am every day to read, exercise, meditate and pray before anyone else woke up. I started looking at the goals every single day and being intentional about achieving them. There were many goals but they mostly fell into the categories of improving my health, my finances and my relationships with those I love. For about six weeks I was ON IT. I was seeing progress and success in many of the areas. For the areas I wasn’t, I had a game plan for improvement.
And then, I was blindsided. Like often happens in life, a life change comes along and disrupts your “normal.” In this case, mine was a positive change. It was an opportunity that crossed my path that I had absolutely no way of anticipating. It practically fell out of the sky. I was offered a short term contract to take on a full time job at a non-profit I care a lot about. It was no where in the life plan. It wasn’t one of the steps in my custom-made planner. A full-time entrepreneur for the last six years, I had never predicted I would ever have a “j-o-b” again. Yet, everything in my body, heart, mind and spirit was telling me to say yes. So, I said yes. I jumped in with both feet and said “I’ll figure the rest out on the way down.”
The last 90 days have been thrilling, fulfilling and simultaneously exhausting and overwhelming. When you add a full time job to an already full plate it naturally is going to push other things to the sideline. There’s only 24 hours in each day. It seemed on a day-to-day basis I was just balancing what would get neglected. Sometimes it was sleep, sometimes self care, sometimes one of my businesses (which by the way had to keep operating through this change), and other days it was quality time with my daughter, husband, family and friends. All in all, no one thing was flushed down the toilet but everything gave a little bit to create the space. Oh, and mind you, six weeks of that time my husband was on back to back large projects for work and GONE. For a few of the weeks he was physically gone as in living in a hotel and I didn’t see him. Other weeks he was sleeping in his bed but not able to contribute his normal weight of the household responsibilities. Simply put, I went into survival mode. Most days, I was not intentional with my time; I just did what I had to survive. Hopefully the friends and family who were used to me being more available are understanding rather than upset that I pretty much disappeared. One of my BFFs said “yeah…when Sophia text message replies started being one word replies instead of novels I knew you were probably just running from one thing to the next constantly.” Haha! She “gets” me.
I feel like I’m on the other side of the chaos now. I am regaining a foundation under my feet and getting a better glimpse of what the “new normal” looks like. Here’s the crazy part…..I would not use the word “stressed” to describe any of it. I had such a strong feeling that I was exactly where I needed to be that I had massive internal peace. It was crazy on the outside, but not on the inside. On the contrary, the years leading up to that moment felt quite the opposite. On the outside everything was together and on the inside I was frustrated, stressed, “stuck” and anxious.
I have come to realize that life is just a series of seasons. Sometimes the transitions are obvious, like a new relationship or the birth of a child. Other times, we don’t realize we are in transition until we’re on the other side. From season to season we are just adjusting to what the “new normal” will be. The last 90 days have been a transition for me. I have a grip now on what this new normal is going to be in this season and I have an internal confidence that I will be here long enough that I can use it as a foundation and start building some structure on top of it.
With that said, for my friends that follow my blog or follow me on social media, here are some of the changes I am going to implement:
– I will be blogging more regularly. I have come to realize that writing is a top priority for me and it’s necessary for me to guard and protect it from being one of the things that falls to the waste side
– I am changing my “Sophia’s health journey” Instagram and Facebook page. This was meant to be something that followed my weight loss journey and yoga practice. Now, I find that a boring and uninteresting conversation. Not that I am not still doing those things but it’s just so surface level. My pursuit of becoming my best self has shown me that so much of what’s happening on the outside reflects what’s happening on the inside. When I was in survival mode the number on the scale went up, the amount of time on the mat went down, and I felt ashamed. I felt like I couldn’t share in my journey if I wasn’t showing success. However, I was learning and growing so much on the inside, and I missed opportunities to share that with others. Health is holistic. It’s not just the body. It’s the mind and the spirit too. I will be combining my writing on this blog with those accounts. It’s going to incorporate anything that I want to share happening externally or internally on my journey to become the best version of myself.
There are two major motivations I have in investing my time into this. First, when I share the journey with others it makes me feel accountable that I need to follow through with doing what I said I was going to do. Second, I believe my purpose in life is to help others grow into their greatness. How can I lead others where I have not been? How can I encourage someone else to do something I’m not willing to do? My hope is that if I am vulnerable in letting you see the steps I take to achieve what I desire, that it will inspire, motivate and encourage you to take the steps you need for you journey too.
In the comments below, I’d love to hear stories of when you have transitioned seasons? What was helpful to you?
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